I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
