The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
