Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
