its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
