I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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