marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
