Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
