How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
