So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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