There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
