Just mADE A PArabola og urine
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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