Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
