So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
