Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Randomize
