...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
