they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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