I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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