Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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