The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
