we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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