Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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