You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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