So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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