so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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