I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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