Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
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