We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
