She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
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