put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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