So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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