finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
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