I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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