I hope mine doesn't look like that
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
