Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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