Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
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