And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
You need Xanax blowdarts
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
