sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
i came on her dog
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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