please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
