I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I am midnight drunk by noon
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
You're like the curious george of whores
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
