I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
