she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
And then he peed in my hair
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