Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize