also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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