You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
