you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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