I wish i was in the wii world.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
