her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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