That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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