My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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