What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
