You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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